HOW FAR IS TOO FAR when it comes your teens privacy?
9 comments:
Anonymous
said...
if you have trust with your teens there should be no going too far. But that only happens on tv, and this is the real world. most teens I believe will say that anything that has to deal with personal relationships (sex) is going too far. But if you don't talk to your teens about their relationships, then you are basically giving them a green light to do anything. What might happen is that they might get pressured into sex and not think about the concequences that might follow. As a good friend told me if your girls boyfriend doesn't have a wedding ring, wedding dress and a wedding cake then they are not serious and just using you for their enjoyment. rf
i believe a parent should have every password to an email or myspace account. a parent should be the one to delete text messages on thier teen's phone.
my teens know they are not permitted to delete these. so about every other day i delete their inbox/outbox when it gets full.
they know i can/may go into their room and look thru their dressers, etc. i agree with the diary thing. however, if signs indicate my teen may be involved with inappropiate material/drugs/boys/ THEN i will read thur the diary to search for clues as to what's going on.
i believe an honest relationship is paramount. however, as a parent, my job is to also PROTECT MY TEEN FROM THEMSELF TOO.
Frodo here< i believe that you need to know for what reason your teens want to go to the mall. other than shopping then i do not agree. personally i know that teens at the mall do not do what they are supposed to there is no authority to keep them in check. no one to answer to for a couple of hours, it only takes a phone call and there out the door to someones house or car doing what they should not be doing. I would go as far to say young teens fall for peer pressure more than older ones and if theres is a good chance of not getting caught they are more likely to try it.sex only takes minutes, drugs only takes seconds and alcohol only takes a swig. dont trust your children can make those tough decisions when there is a chance they can get away with it. children were not taught to lie they were born knowing how to.
I think that if teens want to go to the mall then they should go with an adult. Teens going to the mall by themselves is aking nothing but trouble. Like frodo said it only takes a minute to get into trouble. And with no ADULT supervision they are more likely to do something they are not supose to do. You need to trust you kids, but start off slow and let them build their trust until they betray your trust then you know their limitations. Without trust your kids will not open up to you when it really matters. Boromir
If your teen lives in your household then yes they have privacy but if you, the parent suspect something, then it is your responsibily to check on things and make sure that there is no wrong doing! Parents should be interactive with their kids and know what is going on in their lives. To many parents today snoop around in their kids stuff to find things out. That is the wrong way to do it! Be apart of your kids life and give them chances to do things on their own but at the same time take things away if they can not follow rules that you the parent have set!!! One rule that was used on me and I will definately use on my daughter is: When a curfew time is set, how many minutes you are late will result the number of days you are grounded!!! I was 30 sec. late one night and was grounded for half of the day! It sucked!!! Allow your teens to have their privacy but remind them not to not push the limits!
cool. i love the idea with the curfew. i'll speak to my bride and we may implement this strategy. of course we'd let the kids know the consequence in advance. by the way, this is also crucial to good, godly parenting... the teen knows each consequence before they entertain the poor decision to disobey.
speaking of teens, i strongly encouraged my 13,15 yr old daughters to read SEXY GIRL, by HAYLEY DIMARCO. my 15 yr old shared with me this STATISTIC. teenage girls purchased $152 MILLION worth of thongs in that calendar year. so is it TOO FAR to tell your daughters, "NO, you are not gonna wear thongs."
9 comments:
if you have trust with your teens there should be no going too far. But that only happens on tv, and this is the real world. most teens I believe will say that anything that has to deal with personal relationships (sex) is going too far. But if you don't talk to your teens about their relationships, then you are basically giving them a green light to do anything. What might happen is that they might get pressured into sex and not think about the concequences that might follow. As a good friend told me if your girls boyfriend doesn't have a wedding ring, wedding dress and a wedding cake then they are not serious and just using you for their enjoyment.
rf
i think its to far if you read your daughter's diary or journal wihtout consulting her first.
i dont think there is a TOO FAR.
i believe a parent should have every password to an email or myspace account. a parent should be the one to delete text messages on thier teen's phone.
my teens know they are not permitted to delete these. so about every other day i delete their inbox/outbox when it gets full.
they know i can/may go into their room and look thru their dressers, etc.
i agree with the diary thing. however, if signs indicate my teen may be involved with inappropiate material/drugs/boys/ THEN i will read thur the diary to search for clues as to what's going on.
i believe an honest relationship is paramount. however, as a parent, my job is to also PROTECT MY TEEN FROM THEMSELF TOO.
you know i was wondering, what about dropping your teen off at the mall ?
lets assume they are 13-14 yrs old
whatdoyouthink?
Frodo here<
i believe that you need to know for what reason your teens want to go to the mall. other than shopping then i do not agree. personally i know that teens at the mall do not do what they are supposed to there is no authority to keep them in check. no one to answer to for a couple of hours, it only takes a phone call and there out the door to someones house or car doing what they should not be doing. I would go as far to say young teens fall for peer pressure more than older ones and if theres is a good chance of not getting caught they are more likely to try it.sex only takes minutes, drugs only takes seconds and alcohol only takes a swig. dont trust your children can make those tough decisions when there is a chance they can get away with it. children were not taught to lie they were born knowing how to.
I think that if teens want to go to the mall then they should go with an adult. Teens going to the mall by themselves is aking nothing but trouble. Like frodo said it only takes a minute to get into trouble. And with no ADULT supervision they are more likely to do something they are not supose to do. You need to trust you kids, but start off slow and let them build their trust until they betray your trust then you know their limitations. Without trust your kids will not open up to you when it really matters.
Boromir
If your teen lives in your household then yes they have privacy but if you, the parent suspect something, then it is your responsibily to check on things and make sure that there is no wrong doing! Parents should be interactive with their kids and know what is going on in their lives. To many parents today snoop around in their kids stuff to find things out. That is the wrong way to do it! Be apart of your kids life and give them chances to do things on their own but at the same time take things away if they can not follow rules that you the parent have set!!! One rule that was used on me and I will definately use on my daughter is: When a curfew time is set, how many minutes you are late will result the number of days you are grounded!!! I was 30 sec. late one night and was grounded for half of the day! It sucked!!! Allow your teens to have their privacy but remind them not to not push the limits!
Honestly JB
cool.
i love the idea with the curfew.
i'll speak to my bride and we may implement this strategy.
of course we'd let the kids know the consequence in advance.
by the way, this is also crucial to good, godly parenting... the teen knows each consequence before they entertain the poor decision to disobey.
speaking of teens, i strongly encouraged my 13,15 yr old daughters to read SEXY GIRL, by HAYLEY DIMARCO.
my 15 yr old shared with me this STATISTIC.
teenage girls purchased
$152 MILLION worth of thongs in that calendar year. so is it TOO FAR to tell your daughters, "NO, you are not gonna wear thongs."
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